Dealer Joe’s Natural Turkey Bites

Trader Joe's Organic Turkey Bites

Any time I see a shiny, slender plastic bag partially full of shelf-stable, processed meals like this, I consider astronaut ice cream. I used to like that stuff. So bizarre and distinctive—however looking back, it isn’t practically pretty much as good as any respectable precise ice cream. I believe it was simply the novelty of getting A) ice cream that did not want freezing or refrigeration of any type and B) one thing that area males (and, ostensibly, extraterrestrials) really eat. Additionally, the fun of the hands-on science museum was heightened by the promise of an astronaut ice cream-induced sugar buzz after a quick go to to the present store on the finish of the day. Good occasions.

Right here, we now have astronaut-esque turkey snack bites. I actually want they’d have referred to as the product: Dealer Joe’s Astronaut Thanksgiving. I’d have made positive it acquired a good rating if that had been the title…IF that had been the title. As is, I am simply gonna give it to you straight that this speculative concoction is a bit disappointing.

If you Google the title of those dangerous boys, you get a bit snippet from the Fearless Flyer stating “You’ll be able to take part the reason for advancing snack science at this time by selecting up a 2.5 ounce package deal of Dealer Joe’s Natural Turkey Apple Bites for $4.99.” Dealer Joe’s is giving it to you straight, as properly: a purchase order of this product is charity, plain and easy. In different phrases, please empower us to make bizarre stuff prefer it sooner or later. Or do not.

The turkey bites are delicate little quadrilateral dealies concerning the measurement of a domino. You solely get 12 or so in a pack. They’re pretty dense, so the worth is not horrible, I suppose. I believe they are going for a jerky-ish vibe, though, these are a lot much less chewy, leathery, and dry than conventional jerky. I am not precisely positive what I can evaluate the feel to—it is, like, perhaps someplace in between room-temperature meatloaf and an RxBar…? Sound appetizing? Did not suppose so. Simply bear in mind, you are the guinea pig in a research advancing human data of meals science…or one thing like that.

The flavour is much more…experimental. It isn’t not like that of a turkey-flavored canine deal with. Neither is it a far cry from regular turkey jerky I assume, however there’re additionally apples, raisins, and an odd assortment of garlic and different spices that might solely associate with fruit in some type of home made Thanksgiving stuffing. Once more, I assume that is what they are going for. Astronaut Thanksgiving.

I actually, actually wish to like them. I do. And I am positive somebody on the market does. Quirky, bizarre, protein-rich snacks made with nearly fully natural elements? I am fairly positive Isaac Asimov wrote about these some 60 or 70 years in the past, visionary that he was. Folks laughed at his parallelogram-shaped, compacted turkey and apple bites as “fanciful” and “far-fetched.” Most of these critics are lengthy lifeless…but when they have been nonetheless round, they’d must admit: the longer term is now.

Backside line: 5.5 out of 10.