Trader Joe’s Non Dairy Almond Beverage

Trader Joe's Non-Dairy Almond Beverage

I love my wife and don’t want to doubt her judgment. (After all, I’m one )… but sometimes she has some crazy ideas in her head. Consider me and cereal. Now, I’ve rekindled my love affair with the generic honey nut Cheerios – you know the type, comes in a bag that’s too big to fit in the pantry* – as a “replacement vice” for the former semi-torrid (and all horrid) relationship I had with fast food. Sandy generally approves of my eating habits, except when she thinks I’m putting too many O’s in my bowl. “That’s more that one serving!” “That’s more than one serving!” She says in a voice that sounds just like hers if I told my how much I spent on lottery scratch off tickets. She doesn’t ever serve “police” on any other topic on a daily basis. It doesn’t matter if it’s a vice or that I have lost somewhere around 10-12 pounds in this year. Or that she saves me things like three pizza slices for dinner. I just eat way too much cereal in her book.


A couple of weeks ago, another idea came out of her brilliant, but quixotic, mind. She randomly stated how strange and unnatural it was for humans, given that we are the only animal to do so. I just let that go in my ear, bounced off some hard, and went back out until she brought me a carton almond milk a few days later. It was a good decision, since we don’t like soy milk and dislike rice milk. We also have a reluctance to drink coconut milk (except canned). It was also cheaper than regular organic milk, which I was pleased to discover, and it tasted great.

Although not my favorite brand, Trader Joe’s Non-Dairy Almond Beverage was also very good. It would have been more appealing to call it almond milk, rather than “almond beverage”, as that sounds like some kind of strange soda or juice. There aren’t many things to dislike about it. It is subtly nutty like other almond milks that I have tried. It has a good consistency and smoothness. However, you might notice a little chalkiness if your eyes get too close. Although I wouldn’t recommend drinking it straight, regular milk is something I haven’t done very often with. TJ’s version tastes more like real milk because it isn’t sweetened like other brands. It pairs well with a bowl of cereal or two Oreos and can be trusted to be regular milk’s stunt double. I like it quite a bit.

I also like the packaging, which is bright and pink and very idiot proof. You get what I’m referring to? The store brand we brought before came in a light-tan box with red lettering. This is exactly We buy organic whole milk for our little girl, who may be mildly allergic to nuts. And I HATE whole milk, so the once or twice that we’ve mixed them up in a pre-caffeinated daze were not good experiences – watching/charting/discussing possible hives or ruining an otherwise great bowl of cereal  are not fun ways to spend a morning.

It’s almond milk, and that’s all it is. It’s a great deal for only $2.99. It’ll be on our weekly shopping list, I think. TJ’s has yet another win with this dairy-alternative. Good stuff.

Bottom line: 8 out 10 Golden Spoons for Trader Joe’s Non Dairy Almond Beverage
* Couldn’t find the link, and it makes me mad, but the brilliant comedian Jim Gaffigan has a great bit about bagged cereal, calling it “homeless” because at least other cereals had a box to live in.  As an additional bonus, here’s some great information about ParentingHis or her Amazing cameoIn one of the worst movies of all time.